I want to take things slow emotionally, but fast physically
Seriously though, we're going to drink and watch Survivor first one to puke gets voted off the island
My mom make sausages for dinner...and all I could think of was your dog's penis..
Just registered some guy for opium withdrawals. WTF opium withdrawals, who does opium anymore.
I'm beginning to feel kind of at home at Police stations
I'm home and safer than post-menopausal sex; you're welcome for the image. And yes, I did just use a semi-colon hammered.
THEY ARE MY AGE. THEY ARE YOUR LITTLE SISTER'S AGE THIS IS A DELICATE MATTER. CAPS LOCK
How can you turn a kayak date down? I'M TALKING RIVER HEAD HERE.
I'm getting the lip of my vagina pierced & you expect ME to be the voice of reason?
i refuse to give everyone the satisfaction of seeing the results of my acting on my thoughts
she keeps a switchblade in her panty drawer... i am both terrified and slightly turned on
I just want a boyfriend who will have sex to Disney Pandora.
I had to hose off vomit off my driveway at 9 am.....so hot
Just keep me informed about your plans. That way i can figure out places to go and if i need to shave my balls
I sort of feel bad for this orthodontist. The things that have been in my mouth in the past 12 hours aren't exactly socially acceptable.
Randomize
