Def gonna have stinky sex sometime soon. GOT TO! she has eligible friends for you, as well.
I'm going to go hang out on a giant wooden pirate ship for 5 days.
life is all about the fine print - all i wanted was a fucking pony.
I woke up 25 minutes ago and have been high for 20. Impressive?
I found out during it when he said "my girlfriend never does this" so he's all to blame, I had no idea until half way through.
ITS DAYLIGHT SAVINGS TIME SUNDAY EVERYTHING IS GOING TO BE OK AFTER ALL
yep. it's official. for $40 they will let you lick the stripper pole.
Ummm. I just wanna say this now: Don't let me invite the band back to the apartment to see my stripper pole.
I just went to pick up my pigeon from your house. You should be getting a picture soon
I just listened to "Eye of the Tiger" and did 5 shots to prep going over to see him.
Is it bad that I don't ask for names anymore? Just added "gold-chain-wearing hotel guy" to my list under "minivan 3way" and "funny-tasting gym guy."
We were suposed to have a 3some in their bathroom but it just turned into us 2 making out while he watched like a little kid on christmas morning
Just because you are home alone for the weekend doesn't mean you can act like a nudist.
I accept your opinion but respectfully disagree. Also, I'm sitting in your chair.
Pumped to get "pass out-wake up in Berlin-buy a chinchilla" drunk?
she just kept straddling the railing to the stairs and shouting "come on Seabiscuit, lets win this for America."
Randomize
