ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
everything is bigger in texas. Including my drinking problem.
He told me he had an exgf. and didnt follow up with"and now i like guys."
Just got a blowjob to the theme of Bohemian Rhapsody as the sun was rising. I should just kill myself because ill never top this moment.
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
We're friends. And when I drunkenly send u a pic of my left testicle i would appreciate a response.
your philanthropy is ruining my sex life.
Upside of a two-day migraine: thanks to a prominent "E" in the middle of every pill, I think we can totally pass off Excedrine Migraine as ecstasy to stupid, drunk freshman. This is totally going to happen. That entrepreneurship course is paying off.
I don't care what we do tonight, as long as it makes me forget that my boyfriend just told me he likes taking it up the ass from big guys dressed as construction workers
she's sitting in the bathroom of SA telling people to come in for a toilet ride
we're meeting twins and drinking tequila. i love life
I totally forgot about finals week. im the worst adderall salesman ever.
No other awkward car ride can beat the one you give your drug dealer home.
We're gonna start a pole dancing competition or a bar fight. Stand by for results.
I danced shirtless on a platform with a fucking stripper who went to MIT
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