Iced coffee. Banana. Two dumps. Life is good.
the sex was "jacking off to playboy" bad.
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
I mean I gotta puke to be skinny, wax to be hairless, and drink to be fun. Life isn't easy.
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
yeah...i noticed he pets people when he's drunk. It's odd.
Sorry we're taking so long, this weed cake tastes amazing with Tabasco sauce on it.
do you still have a key to my apartment? Without going into too much detail locked myself out naked on the patio, currently using a deck cushion to cover myself so kids walking home from school dont see me
I may puke in class so I'm excited to see how that goes
She tackled him mid-puke while the other two were cutting up a $60 dildo with a kitchen knife and putting the pieces in a Corona bottle.
I just had a mental image of us riding a tractor through hell with one of those big guns mounted on top of it shooting at everyone while the indiana jones music plays.
What's the procedure for answering a booty call from someone under house arrest?
My legs feel like baby dolphins
girls shouldnt black out with american flag bandaids on their nips
Dad literally changed the channel from an episode of Big Bang Theory to another episode of Big Bang Theory. That's why I hate this show.
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