I didn't say she couldn't, I said you shouldn't.
Get out of your relationship and into my pants.
i am already firmly committed to doing irish carbombs w/ 12 different people, and the st pattys day party doesnt start for another 24 hours. i may die
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
Responsibility does not care about your dick.
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
i dont care. it has been a 14 hour day, and we are all celebrating by alternating shots and grilled cheese.
When you get up and look at yourself in the mirror, don't be alarmed. The doctor assured us last night that it looked way worse than it actually was and there won't be a scar when the stitches come out
Trial is expected to last a fucking week if I get chosen.
To be fair, you are the kind of person I want to be on the jury when I inevitably end up in front of one.
I have got to stop letting people hang ornaments from my nipple ring.
Tis the season.
our relationship was basically a one night stand, with a three week long, morning after
I need you to perform a face transplant. Please remove your face from your accounting book and relocate it to where it's most needed - between my legs.
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
I know. I'm a saint. Saint of sitting on faces.
How is it that I know 4 different bartenders who won't charge me for drinks, but I can't get laid?
Randomize
