Yeah he is here but I can't let him know I am until he has like 30 min worth of drinks. so when he see me he isn't like "omg ew,NO!"
I have so much to learn from you, wise slut
you never know when you'll meet the man of your dreams and bang him in an elevator
mom and dad sent me an easter basket full of beer pong supplies again.
It was also my first failed attempt at shower sex.
I bought this skirt with every intention to have it wrapped around my tits by the end of the night. So, I'm not a whore. I'm a self-fulfilling prophecy.
he laminated a picture of his dick.
Going to get a "plan B"urrito
I woke up this morning in the house, I didn't realize it was physically possible to duct tape a person to the wall...
Do you know how I hurt my ankle or my shoulder? Or the origin of any of the following mystery bruises: left quad, left wrist, right elbow. Thanks for playing.
I want this pizza in and around my mouth forever..
I just went through the Wendy's drive thru only wearing a towel. My life has hit an all time low
I just had some kinky fun in the back seat of my car behind a Ralph's in south county. How's your thanksgiving eve?
I had to ask him for a dick pic. Do you know how refreshing that was?
The pee I just pissed was about 7% better than the one at your house. But both are pretty far up there.
I just used my vibrator to scratch my back. This being single shit is for the birds
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