Fuck, operation next sex victim is on as soon as i get back. Do not sleep with that red head, nobody likes accidental ginger babies.
is it bad that listening to the rabbi's wife talk about how we should only be with one person is making me really, really horny for no string attached sex
His band may suck, but it's not like I'm sleeping with all of them.
I'm handcuffed to the toilet. Don't ask
I'm not going to need your "it doesn't mean you're a slut" pep talk after all.
I bruised my spine.. Jungle gyms were clearly not meant for sex.
He said you stopped mid-fuck, called fives on his dick, walked out to grab another drink, and came back.
Do drug dealers work on Memorial Day?
Im breaking out the trunk vodka tonight, its been aged to perfection.
I see you met someone special
I'm pretty sure that's why we have such good sex because we are secretly trying to kill each other
My 1st STD. I feel like there should be a cake for this.
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
I was 40 minutes late to work today because I was getting fucked. Walked in to discover that it's apparently performance review day. Employee of the year.
Haha i really think theres no better way to tell a paramedic sorry for breaking your nose than a beautiful and healthy edible arrangement...
She just kept screaming and saying "fucking you is like fucking a mountain"
Randomize
