these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
is this the only place in the world where you can get shot on one side of town, and have to stop for cows crossing the street on the other side?
so, my congressman just called me to say he has office hours this week if i'm still interested in talking to him. i pray to god this is not related to Friday.
Do you ever just think "I could really go for a good 30 minute blowjob". I do. Everytime jill smiles.�
Bruises. Everywhere. Table sex is dangerous
she was wide awake when they drew a treasure map on her face the she passed out and they played like 7 games of tic tac toe haaa how was your new years
its like i had a thought but i dont know what the words are for it
I tried to find the bar, ended up at a car dealership. Then the alarms went off.
I mean, "boo" isn't the appropriate response to someone dying...
You pretty much lost your mind. Your ego has gotten ten time the size of your balls.
somehow a ride to walgreens turned into a threesome.
My sister's exploding appendix just cock blocked me...
Well waking up naked, covered in Chex mix is not how I planned to start my Wednesday if that's what you're getting at.
That was fun and all, but let's never have sex on a ladder ever again.
For full disclosure: I told my roommates last night that you have a very clean asshole.
Randomize
