I would like to feed your fingertips to the wolverines.
I love having hate sex.
You weren't lying about those ceramics students giving the best hand jobs.
She called me in the morning crying, but I was busy cleaning up bird guts, very hungover. It was a very surreal morning.
I'm taking a new approach to homewrecking... for science. Or I totally would. I have to see what happens between my ex & his brother when he finds out.
All right cuz right now I'm in one of those moods where the shear thought of doing anything more strenuous than making a sandwich has me wanting to curl up in the feeble position and splash around in a puddle of my own tears.
Was it you who made out with a toothless guy last night?
You were all "think outside the box, inside the bag!" as you filled your camelback with beer.
Had sex in a cemetery last night during a thunderstorm. I feel like my goth points have skyrocketed
For the record, rock bottom is where you start crying during porn because your ex used to slap your ass like that.. Continue on with your day now.
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
Also food confession I ate an entire bag of starburst jelly beans today. and a plan B. All around think I hit all my nutrients
My brother really should've known better than to make me go egg hunting with his daughter when I was entirely too drunk to do so. Threw up in a plant in front of her.
i found you laying on the floor staring at the ceiling and you kept muttering "why" in various inflections.
Listen all I know is that mistakes were made and she stole the car and drove half an hour for food at 4 am
Randomize
