Forgive me I'm always horny when I wake up
i have the same doorman on the day shift as the guyi shacked with has on the night shift. he just laughed at me when i came home this AM. FML
Lady with a stroller in a bar. Think she's out of my league?
Only your vagina holds the key to what happened last night.
did the walk of shame through a baseball field. .A little league game was going on. Proceeded to buy a hot dog at the concession stand. the looks were priceless.
it's been like two and a half months. And I swear, I keep seeing walking dicks. I think I'm going crazy cause of lack of sex..
There's a paramedic out here, what have you done?
my vagina has been out of service for wayy too long... this semester needs to start like right now
I hope the dean has a raincoat on because I'm prolly gonna throw up on him when I get my degree
It's not like I'm never gonna put out again. I'm a sure thing. I promise.
I'm lost. Please come find me. I'm inside the I-270 circle somewhere. I can hear laughing.
I knew full well that at some point during the night my penis would be out with this costume choice
I'm driving home wearing one sock, boxers, and a tee shirt. That's how good it was
Yeah! Don't let me leave the house without marijuana and a juicer.
So...I'm pretty sure I have officially determined that reverse cowgirl is the only position possible to have sex in my smart four two
Randomize
