Dude wtf I'm sitting behind some girl in class who is creeping on my facebook page. I don't even know who she is..
i recognized the place by the puke stain i left on the pool table when i hooked up with his roommate.
i dont know everytime i see her teeth i get erectile disfunction
Indoor beer darts at Rafs just turned into a trust exercise of putting your hand on the wall and closing your eyes while the other throws.. Almost gave Cale a Tracheotomy
Makers Mark. Chicken nuggets in a blender. Smart
I just took the cheapest shot in your honor
do you know where my other puke covered boot is
I learn from experience and I experienced what it would be like to completely lose my mind and then wake up with a stab wound.
Hi this is the guy from the cell phone store. Your Dad just upgraded your phone as a surprise. I didn't tell him about your topless pics on your phone. I transfered them to new phone. Nice rack!
He's going to find out eventually, but really what's he going to do? Cry about it and buy another fucking kitten??
Yes. Life would be much easier if we had penises & could do whatever the fuck we want.
If he refers to me as slump buster one more fucking time.
NO. NONE OF THAT. SHAME ON YOU.
When we were in Vegas he tried to get an Elvis impersonator to act dead on a toilet so he could take photos. This is even worse
He was so drunk last night. He woke up out of a dead sleep at 330am, walked over to the dresser, opened his middle drawer and proceeded to pee. When I woke up and asked him Wtf he was doing, he told me it was fake pee and blamed it on the cat...we don't have a cat
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