ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
We discussed our relationship status. We're dating exclusively. And the conversation was followed by him saying "C'mon baby, let's make you orgasm!" .....I'm gonna marry him.
then she said she was half-a-virgin and that she would appreciate it if i would finish what her old booty call started
Ok so I could say "im sorry"...but instead ill just say "unsupervised...jager...military guys...green school bus called the juice box...and HUGE dick"
another part of my inner child died when i emptied my crayon bank for dollar beer night.
Is it wrong that I want to do a nude photo shoot with nothing but a light saber?
moms trying to set me up with a 28 year old. hes graduated university like im getting high in my bed and he's an adult
When i was tripping hard i was banging Jeff's roommate and her room turned into Hogwarts
Also when we were banging i thought my high school librarian was perched up on top of the stereo like a gargoyle but it ended up just being her cat
Maybe you can just make seal noises during sex and we can call it good
I don't know if the puke on my pants is mine or not
So I justmade it back home and was greeted to a squirrel in my dorm... Last time I let my friends rent it out for a party.
Ok, you agree to the terms? We can have sex, but this doesn't mean we're back together...it just means we're working on things. Got it? Sign here.
I had sex while watching Lord of the Rings last night. I think I just reached a new level of nerd.
Somehow my life has turned in to drug deals at the bar, and illegally camping on a mountain because I have no where else to live.
Randomize