All the good ones are taken. All that's left is the Harry Potter geek or the asshole in the corner. I think I'll settle for Harry Potter.
I wanna fuck padma even more now that she's preggers. Is that sick?
Yes but- 100% agreed
I came out of bedroom with my jeans on backwards, zipped AND buttoned. I have inconceivable talents whilst intoxicated.
He just used my bikini trimmer to give himself a fumanchu. And I still plan on having sex with him tonight. This has to be what true love feels like.
I knew as soon as I saw that pole that I was going to wake up the next morning with bruises.
If a video of someone that looks like me banging that chick on the hood of her car in some parking lot suddenly shows up on the web... let me know, I gotta see how that turned out.
Anal and Aoki tickets...I'd say I give pretty good Valentines Day gifts.�
Can I interview you during sex or would that be weird?
Ahh, 151. Think of it this way: it took one shot to get you buzzed, I took eight. I may or may not have broken a tv with my skull that night and met someone's parents naked and hungover the next morning.
shotgunning beer in rite aid bathroom. hurry
He's hot....knda sweaty, drunk smells like feet....but he's hung like a whale....so in other words totally your type
Bro. I traded my coat. I have a Raiders coat now.
The man sent me a video of him doing the helicopter, the least I can do is go visit him in the hospital
I just gave them my two week notice. Now is the perfect time to fuck my boss's son
please tell me you're the one making all the weird noise in the yard..
Randomize
