I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
do you know how hard it is to sit through a 3 hour movie with someone and not fuck them?
Im watching someone hooking up in the library
procrastination at its finest
I just delivered a ham and cheese to a strip club. you were right this job is not that bad
i dont want to stoop that low. but my dick does.
America approved of our night. A bald eagle flew over us at 7am
I just got cash back from buying a pregnancy test so that I can buy a case of joose. My life is in shambles.
Once you mention butt plugs, conversations always take a turn for the worst.
Your mother liked my album on facebook that's only filled with drunk pictures. I don't know what to feel about this
Also, since I switched back to this phone I've found a crop of dick pics and your funeral arrangements.
I think i just shit in their garbage can, I'm ready for that ride u owe bro.
I was just hotboxing under my sheets and I got lost on the way out.
It was so scary.
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
I may have just tried to argue quantum entanglement as the reason I was still in her bed.
I just made some sangria and taking a roadie on my stroller walk around the hood! Parenting at its finest
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