when you close your eyes do you see, that mystical creature will be me.
who is this?
in the 'for' section of the check i put "when we got drunk and broke things". again im sorry.
we couldnt tell if he was gay so we started working glee quotes into the conversation to see if he noticed.
Remind me tomorrow to take that ball-gag out of my purse.
His ankle bracelet went off in the middle of sex. That makes a girl reevaluate her life...
I'm a lady, I can't pee on the ceiling. Even I don't have that power.
Cuz its complicated and I hate complicated and I miss your penis
There's a point around the one and a half minute mark where the keg stand goes from impressive to pathetic
Yeah kinda weird. My grandparents are here for dinner and I'm chilling on the couch close to tripping out on pain killers. My pap asked me how works going and I prettymuch drooled on myself as an answer.
It's official, I need to start putting my vagina's needs before my own.
Well when you get back to your computer, there's a nice explanation of pansexuality on your Skype.
2nd year in a row being a arrested before school starts...tradition at its finest
She's been with the dude for a week saying she's in love. Yeah so am I. I just opened this beer 5 minutes ago and I LOVE IT ALREADY.
Just had a small freak out because I couldn't get my bra unhooked and thought I was gonna be stuck in it forever.
Just because I know you’ll get a kick out of this, I sneezed earlier and cupcake frosting came out
Randomize
