its not stalking. its research.
so they made cookies with their faces printed on them...I ate jaime...she tasted like poop
we're taking a shot everytime we receive a "Happy Thanksgiving!!!!!" mass text. up to 7 since 10am. God help us.
And the cops told us we were all naked.
We had a long talk in which he told me he respects me more than any other girl. 30 minutes later, I got a facial.
i've really grown. sober me left an alarm for me every 10 minutes that said NO FAT CHICKS!
dude. im stealing that.
hotdog in my bra and i still managed to score. Got a bit freaked when he tried to eat it though. I paid 3 bucks for that fucking hotdog.
Tell me again your tentative move date. There are 5 Russians in my apartment on ecstasy and they are having a rave in my living room. I can't. I need to move stat
I just don't understand how she's willing to go through so much planning and effort just to get a dick inside of her
I was apparently the best non-Irish person at the party. I wore my skating dress, Austrian flag and a giant shamrock. Everyone is calling me "30 Shots Girl".
I called you a cum goblin in my voicemail. I stand by it.
I HAVE PIZZA MONEY AT ALL TIMES IT'S CALL EMERGENCY PLANNING
well it was naive of you to actually think you're the only bday sex he had lined up for him today. I'm just suprised he actually had a line forming outside of his room
he's drunk and referred to his shoes as foot condoms
At some point i am going to say to you "i have this really bad idea! You in? " just go with it.
Randomize
