Ok just saw a girl open a pillbox, dump it out on her notebook and count out 13 adderall tabs and put them in a baggie and leave. Oh hey college.
already putting money aside for 4/20. you ready for the greatest tuesday ever?
Just found out you can rent the rollerena for 100 bucks and you can bring your own beer... when are you free this week?
thank god dogs can't talk. they see way to much.
She agreed that we could have sex whenever I wanted and I could let someone else meet my mom.
She wanted to roleplay. Apparently you be snow and i'll be a plow wasn't an option
I need to stop getting so excited when a guy unzips his pants and its bigger than my boyfriends. I look like a kid in a candy store.
And please let him know I don't normally go off on long rants about feminist theory. That was totally the vodka talking.
You helped blow my nose... Ok it's safe to say we are on a new level of relationship..
Haha it's harder than you'd think to come up with ways to turn your penis into a Christmas drawing
I just Miyagied my roommate through her first set of tit pics. Her fuck buddy owes me.
you weren't there so I had to flirt with him on your behalf
Some how my underwear was hanging from the antlers of a antelope head on the wall of the hotel........
How do I un-spend everything I bought last night? Seriously...was a penis shaped piñata and enough tequila to fill my bathtub really that necessary?
At least you can say you've literally dumped money down the drain
Just because you got dumped by some loser doeant mean you need Jesus. It just means you need better friends and some booze
Randomize
