The weather is perfect in Seattle right now. Warm enough for girls to not wear bras, but cold enough for me to see them nipping out in the shade.
The university put out a message about those missing salt and pepper shakers... You should at least give back 60 of them.
my summer class's final was canceled bc it interfered with the world cup. he is giving us all A's on it. I love europe
I made him drop me off at the wrong house waited for him to leave and crawled through several fences so he couldnt stalk me. How was your night?
Can you explain to me later why there's a pirate hat in my bathtub
like teasing for 28 minutes, then the very last 2 minutes is where is ALL goes down. I'm talking, rings off, stable sitting position, hand job madness.
Is re-gifting a Valentine's Day present worse than re-gifting a Xmas one?
You're unbelievable, unbelievably awesome.
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
He's hot....knda sweaty, drunk smells like feet....but he's hung like a whale....so in other words totally your type
Her boyfriend offered to buy me a vibrator. I'm not sure how to feel about that.
I force fed him french fries and then proceeded to tell him how sexy corgi’s are … it’s safe to say he’s not texting me for a second date.
Do the security cameras outside your house capture sound? If so your whole family is going to hear me describe my threesome
It occurred to me today, whilst I was on the phone to boyfriend number 1, whilst in the car with boyfriend number 2 who was dropping me at the shops to meet boyfriend number 3 to help me buy a present for boyfriend number 4 that I should be having much more sex than I am.
Whose the chick running for dorm president promising bigger dicks and softer toilet paper? That’s who I m voting for
I basically spent the entire weekend in bed with that red head.Every time I tried to leave she got me too horny to think straight. I was kidnapped by vagina
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