Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
That girl's pussy is like White Castles, you crave it once in awhile, but you know next morning you regret eating it.
The more I hate his personality, the more I love his penis.
Just saved her as "new hostess that randy banged" ...I forgot her name
My life has literally become a dickpocolypse. Thank you, summer, I missed you.
Are you still at the party or did I leave?
A true measure of a good friend is how long she responds to her friends drunken illogical texts. Youre a champ.
so now that i'm sober i just want to apologize for violating your back seat...... on a brighter note thank you for playing the little mermaid song "kiss the girl," really set the mood.
No, he's ok. He just broke his teeth on the stripper pole. No biggie.
The guy I met last night said we had a real connection and gave me his AA coin because he met me during his relapse
I just spent my entire state tax return on sex toys
I've already dropped her on the ground of a crowded bar dancing , been incoherent drunk to the point i couldn't speak and came within 2 seconds all on separate evenings so at this point she should know what I'm about
I was just going for a one night stand and now I'm at breakfast with his entire family.
My house is about to be spotless and the only person visiting is the plumber and not the porno kind.
I'm glad I date someone who likes the simple things. Sex, kittens, and McDonald's.
Randomize
