someone get that fucking seahorse.
a strip club that doesn't allow touching or asking for sex... whats the point?
unless her vagina can tell me my horoscope in sign language, I'm not going.
I kind of want you to get arrested just so I could frame an avatar mugshot.
I had to step in when you tried to make it rain baking powder on my sister
while you laid on the ground I poured water into your mouth out of dog bowl some random guy walks by and said now that's what I like to see.
VODKAVODKAVODKAYESSSS
Its like the unofficial aniversary of the loss of her virginity. And I will be giving tours of the spot they did it in and showing how I'm serious when I say the grass doesn't grow there anymore.
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
My gynecologist got a full view of the obviously bite marked shaped bruises on my thighs. I just kept talking about work and hoped she wouldn't judge me.
The security deposit's gone, let's trash this motherfucker
Church parking lot, park bench, front porch. I think she's more comfortable going down on me in public. May have found the one.
oh. oh my god. i just had lunch with my mom with semen still on my face.
I should not be allowed to be in possession of a fifth and a phone at the same time.
Stripping out of my teacher clothes to Talk Dirty to Me. Who let me become a teacher?
Masturbating with Lord of the Rings on was not how I planned my afternoon going but here I am.
Randomize
