I'm pretty sure you can't just waltz into a walk in clinic and ask them to de-baby you.
I couldn't accept the bj. My penis has done nothing wrong and didn't deserve the punishment of her face.
Sometimes he has weird facial hair...Basically he has a penis... that's what he's got going for him.
Woke up with my face in a bowl of cereal. This is tequila's way of saying fuck you.
Dear Derek. I would like to offer my sincerest apology for the 2 to 6 text messages you are about to read. Also for the 15 minute voicemail, which may or may not have sent. Sincerely, Sober Katie
I don't know but someone, somewhere gave someone a hand job and someone else was pissed about it...
I went commando last night, then accidentally flashed a police van...They acknowledged it.
It's a delicate game of how much porn can I look at without the other interns noticing.
That guy has been pretty randomly in and out of my vagina for 4 years...I don't think I'm required to tell him when I'm dating.
Good point.
Know anything about my roof collapsing last night?
Tequila.
I'm watching the World Cup in bed naked with john and our USA flag aviator glasses. Can you say America?
Well I just finished dry heaving so I think breakfast is a little further out for me
Nothing more awkward that being butt ass naked in a guys bed and his ex wife shows up with his kid....
I'm slowly starting to accept that you have to be a sociopath to be attracted to me
it was like reliving my childhood drunk at a bar.
Randomize
