Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
Come over! I've just turned Titanic into a drinking game. I drink every time I want to fuck Leonardo DiCaprio.
the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
Yeah i wasn't gonna go out but then i was like im not gonna get my dick wet stayin at home studying
Sometimes I worry for your future but then I remember how big your boobs are.
He made me a "booty call of the year" award.
And then out of the blue she sent me a youtube video mashup of cats puking to techno music
Mega depressed bro. Had the greatest sex with the hottest girl I've ever seen and in the AM she gave me that look I've given dozens of times. I'm her drunken fat chick fuck
Wonderful brian is stoned out of his mind, floating in a lawn chair in the hot tub eating a giant plate of macaroni and staring at the moon
She kept throwing quarters at him and yelling "Goooaaallll!!" whilst taking her clothes off one by one. I'd say she had a good night
My head is pounding and I need an ice pack for my vag. Successful friendsgiving!
I couldn't drown my sorrows in an ocean of jack daniels. They may have scuba gear.
If I don't get to have sex with him soon my entire female reproductive system is gonna climb out of my body and choke me to death
I forgot what I was gonna say, but I'm pretty excited to not be pregnant.
The air tonight was full of shame when we saw each other.
Well if u wouldn't have had sex on the front porch last night I think that could have been avoided.
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