No awkward lesbian experiences without me
I could have mohawked her pubes.
I'm giving you permission to use the abortion money to pay for your DUI.
i just looked up and i was like omg ballsack and then i didnt know what to do
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
Taking shots out of pine wood derby trophiesssssss. best idea ever.
My arms are sore from holding up pukeahontas for so long
You stuck your entire fist into a full jar of peanut butter and starting assaulting people
can't blv i tried using a "backpack" as a unit of measurement...i drank a lot of beer last night
They switched jackets and you didn't notice. You made out with both of them and had no idea
Really because I got kicked out the eagles game for running up n down the steps singing ' fly eagles fly ' then punched a Dallas fan in the face before the game even started..
Fuck you, you can't judge me til you've smelt my boobs.
If you loved me you'd bring cheese fries and a condom
im so sad I can't openly talk about acid tab Sundays
Still drunk, heading to class.
It's 3 a.m. Dude
Doesn't mean I'm not at my desk. Ill wait.
Randomize
