idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
i wonder how he feels talking to my mother about jesus with a condom on his dick
So we sucessfully lit our bathtub on fire. Thought you should know.
the only bad part about drinking alone is that in the morning there's nobody who can tell you what you did
Dude you don't even know. I spilled the tequila and it took 4 people to stop me from drinking it off the table.
Its like a zucchini between his legs. An orgasmic zucchini.
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
We were on the ground in Tampa for 55 hours and we drank for 30 of them.
We won Spring Training 2013.
Step 1: chug a red bull vodka with no ice Step 2: chase that with a shot of wild turkey Step 3: chase that with a shot of tequila
Step 4: your drunk
I want to fuck the side burns off of Steve.
I'm the only person who goes to break up a friends with benefits and comes out with a boyfriend
Then, he ate me out while I watched Bo Burnham. Best. Night. Ever.
I got titty fucked last night and you're breastfeeding your newborn. Clearly we have gone two totally different paths since 2011.
I got so drunk last night that I was drunk in my dream. Good night
I do have a moral compass! I can’t help it if it only points at penises
Randomize
