i never realize how drunk i am until i start using people as human stripper poles
Last night when I was hammered I set a reminder to tell you that your boobs are my favorite ones in the world, so this is me giving you that message.
She's "scared" of blowjobs, so she just played with it for a while.
Well right now I am watching him use the fire extinguisher off the pourch.
Idk we were snorting lines and making out in the stall while these people were cheering us on, on the other side. And that's when I realized he wasn't the only guy in the girls bathroom.
I'm imaging you naked, covered in butter. And I gotta say, I'm not impressed.
By the way. I expect to test the theory of you running a mile drunk for memorial day.
dude when im high using logic is an accomplishment that should be rewarded. make sure u get cinnamon twists
My class coordinator for bio told us that the only thing we should do the night before an exam is to get laid. And then party down after the exam. I like him.
sometimes, you gotta take him by the hands like tails took sonic, and fly him into the bedroom.
Thanks for bringing me tea/a bucket. You have earned yourself a face touch.
Good friends chat about sex - great friends ask about safe words.
I'm about to do something based solely on the fact that a fortune cookie told me to. This may not end well.
It is like...the most transformative hard on I have ever had.
the voting booth dude cock blocked me or she woulda totally blown me in the voting booth.
Randomize
