coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
there's nothing like watching the sun rise at the library alone on a friday morning to make you want to kill yourself.
Apparently getting drunk, buying a guitar from your local costco and walking in to an open mic night is not the same as rocking out to guitar hero...
He called himself excalibur. Thats all I remember.
while you laid on the ground I poured water into your mouth out of dog bowl some random guy walks by and said now that's what I like to see.
the upside of dating someone over 21: he can buy me a pregnancy test AND a bottle of wine when he goes to cvs for me
Sex-sore abs and my workout pants have gravel stains on the knees. It's like the workout of shame.
Did you seduce any young men into coming home to your love nest of poutine and jäger bombs?
Yo if you blacked out last night, careful going through your purse. There's cocaine in a lollipop wrapper.
If a marine in My bed is not considered a valid excuse for missing class then I don't want to live in America anymore
Called my house today and my 10 year old brother answered and asked if I was still in jail
So apparently Facebook just randomly finds the girl who gave me a hard handy despite having no mutual friends...
CRAIGSLIST IS NOT THE ANSWER
IM LONELY AND HORNY
Worst way to find out I have a half sister
I told my mom Jesus would want me to snort drugs on his birthday
Randomize
