that speech was about as successful as her performance in twilight
Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
I just remembered we were doing butt clenching exercising with bar straws last night
Only you could manage to look like a complete slut while wearing a turtle neck.
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
Is he smart?
Why would i know that. That would deal with the top half of his body. I only deal with the bottom half.
please bring me a paper towel asap.
I was drinking wine in bed and spilt some on my chest.. And I cautiously guided it into my belly button but now I dont know what to do.
Day drinking is so dangerous way too many construction workers out there to flirt with
I've counted four places at work I need to get laid in. Come help me accomplish this.
Hey, I'm your guy
One minute we were playing beer pong, and the next minute I was sprinting to my apartment with a watermelon. wtf happened in between?
this new dose of ADD meds is totally being waisted with the unemployed new graduate thing if only I could add my hyper focused side effects to a coverletter
he tried to have the "are we in a relationship" chat last night. I stuck my fingers in my ears, yelled lalalalalala very loudly at him and told him I would stop having sex with him if he ever tried that conversation again. bad person, or just being a realist?
If I end up in the hospital remind me to order jimmy johns.
Why?
They deliver.
Heard about your divorce. Let me know if I can do anything for you or your penis ;-)
Call me a snob but I'm not banging chicks with more fingers than teeth.
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