He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
So I pulled my t-shirt down, pushed my boobs up and marched right into that church!
Standing in line for a prescreening of Alice in Wonderland - guy just passed out cold in front of us - first drug overdose of the Alice in Wonderland phenomenon witnessed.
Just woke up with a blunt in each nostril and a lighter duct taped to my chest...good lookin out
so the photographer said "let's get a picture of the cousins" so we posed together, and then he said " lets get a picture of the couples" So we posed together.
There where 3 half naked girls passed out on the pool table, I crawled under it and just as I was about to go to sleep some guy walks up and says: "dude nice spot" walks away and comes back with a pillow.
Don't worry, I could have been accepted their by waving my dick at the admissions building.
Sometimes you just have to have sex for a Netflix password.
TSA literally pulled two bottles of whiskey out of my bag. Once he saw the leopard print socks and the mickey mouse tank, he put it back in my bag and said "Have a fun trip, man."
i just found my fake in the snow. LIFE IS AWESOME
You were drunk at 5 You went to the dining hall and cried because your brain and fingers weren't working. Your RA came up to you and suddenly you became sober. I was very proud of you.
my comprehension of H.D. Thoreau really dives after 8 beers.....
It will astound me if they ever let you graduate.
Dude. why do I feel like I am cheating on you every time I do shrooms?
NOT PREGNANT HIGH FIVE!
And, by “make you dinner” I mean “have lots of sex and multiple orgasms.” So you should probably eat something and before you come over
And hydrate too
Randomize
