i want to open my blinds to let the sunlight in my room, but i'm afraid my neighbors will be able to see me drinking and judge me
I have a love/hate relationship when men come within a 10 minute time frame.
No, I was feeling sad because all of the other girls were like model-skinny. But then I remembered that I had big boobs and went to hit on their boyfriends.
I wont touch it. I promise i wont touch it. JUST GET UNDER THE DAMN TABLE PLEASE.
other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
remember last year when i left for the bar in flip flops and came back in heels?
it happened again.
Found her in the closet eating mayo out of the jar with a knife
Fell in the ditch running from the pizza guy I stole the pizza from. If you are still at my house come find me, pretty sure I need stitches.
Climbing through a window thats four feet off the ground isnt the easiest thing when youre high, trust me.
But for future reference, it might help your game if you don't tell the girl you're trying to get on your dick that she's "not the worst thing you've ever seen"
I JUST FOUND AN INTERNATIONAL POLE DANCING CHAMPIONSHIP IN SPANISH
I can't name a single part of my body that isn't sore. Who says break up sex is bad sex?
Just an FYI i'm going to get drunk as shit while you are on duty and attempt to not fall into the bathtub again.
Rodger that.
Would seriously like to slash his tires but then I feel like I'd have to deal with him longer.
Yep. Just fucked a 34 year old on the football field where we both went to high school. That's a story for the grandkids.
Randomize
