wake up i wanna do it froggy style
I am NOT getting arrested in a batman mask
He has been begging me for a Bj but doesnt want to get mono
How is he gunna get mono? is he gunna suck on his dick after you?
i think i scared a bird with my dick
I just got a Community College debit card in the mail. My failure has been materialized.
I smoked a bowl while he ate me out, you need to change your major to match making asap. You are a guru of love.
Woke up this morning with a junior police officer sticker over my nipple this morning.
She just opened a six pack of corona with her car door ... I had no idea she was such a skilled drunk
I mean there are things broken right and left, I woke up surrounded by dog statues, and we had a vodka bubble bath.
I got laid while wearing a shirt with a picture with my little brother deep throating a banana on it.
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
Timehop reminded me that 4 years ago today I helped a one armed man do the YMCA by being his other arm.
He slept outside in his hammock, and then took a lawn chair with him in the shower because he was too drunk to stand up.
Vodka, MiraLAX and Gatorade are perfect for the night before a colonoscopy
A guy just threw up in my lecture of 500 ppl and just got up and walked away
Randomize
