I don't think ill make it tonight the floor wont let me walk
Was the mom I hooked up with decently attractive I feel like her two friends were hotter
And why did 3 people fail to stop me from literally getting a piggy back ride from the bar to his apartment?!
We did naked snow angels in 14 degree weather, you can't tell me you had more liquor at that party
You only ask me to come over when your gf is gone, and thats usually at midnight to cook chicken salad and watch you pass out
Mmmhmmm sure, nice try, but there's certain wounds that only bj's can heal
I have a challenge for you: find out where you are. you will receive Taco Bell if you succeed
Dude just pulled his dick out and started stroking it and making s sound like cocking a shotgun....wtf was in those e pills
He told me my butthole was like "Narnia" and that it's a wonderful place he would like to visit.
I will be there. invited or not. I go where the pancakes go.
Watching my ex make out with another girl is weird.
But she's wearing a jumpsuit so I feel better.
Can you send me the pictures of me riding the penis
Shaving your balls drunk sounds like a good idea untill you do it
Baruch atah adonai DAT ASS DOE
We were gonna go out drinking tonight but she found out she's pregnant so are you free
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