I just saw a commercial that said "call your doctor if erections last more than 4 hours". I said "disgusting" and my mom said "I know, i hate when that happens." Get me out of here.
He was on Keeping Up with the Kardashians it was like a deed from god to bang him
The drunk teletubby stumbling out of the place tipped me off..
Yes. No, I'm basically a superhero but with drugs. I'm robin hood. I steal from the rich (insurance and drug companies) and give to the poor (everyone I know).
Swear to god you say cuddle bunny one more time and honest to god I will sacrifice a bunny on the hood of your car
I woke up at 4am on the floor covered in olive oil and fire extinguisher powder but all I wanted to know was where the rest of my booze was at.
As I read your response saying I need a tan before I can become a go-go dancer, a girl cane up to work and gave me 10 coupons for 100 days of tanning for a dollar.
This is fate. You were destined to be a stripper.
You very well can't change your mind now. It would upset the natural flow of life.
Honestly you'd think more guys would be happy to date a cute female dealer, but apparently something about safety or whatever
I would use the term shit faced but I'm too polite for that
Then he said,"I love you like a sister I like to have sex with."
It looks like you got dick slapped by the sandman..
WHO GIVES HANDJOBS AT 8 IN THE FUCKING MORNING
Listen, some people have dreams, some people just want to cock slap a kangaroo
Well I'm nervous now about the consequences of letting you loose
It's a big decision, I respect that you need to think about it.
Three cheers for handling my crush on my boss in an entirely reasonable manner, by having a threesome with my coworkers.
Randomize
