alone in the kitchen at 4 am eating a hotdog.
My body isn't even mad at me...just disappointed
Goldfish can't live in a bowl filled with tequila, lesson learned.
On that note; HAPPY 21: THE SEQUEL from the back of an ambulance!!
This is even worse then that time I fucked a guy just because he had air conditioning.
This was just another one of those days you wished you had a penis-size indicator instead of wasting your time isn't it?
Heaven was on the 3rd floor and Hell was on the first. When the cop walked up he was confused as to who the noise complaint was for and wrote both apartments a noise violation.
THIS NIGHT WILL NOT GO DICKLESS
A blow job from a tiger shark would still entail less risk to your genitals than having sex with her.
Do you think I shall pursue this journey to the center if the dick?
Eating a grilled cheese at a strip club... good idea??
Well if she's the kinda girl that doesn't want you after seeing a pic of your balls squeezed together, she's not the girl for you.
I feel like everything in my life has been preparing me for my future sex robot experience
You’re so close!!!
Man, I'm never going tanning again he noticed the burns on my ass
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize
