come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
Then he took his girlfriend's fuzzy handcuffs and locked me to their bed. Key is in an unknown location. He's surprisingly idiotic, for being premed.
THERE WAS A HANDPRINT OF BLOOD ON HIS SHOULDER
I cant believe they held hands while getting simultaneous bjs
130 PACKAGES of glow sticks! The going rate of a rave is $38.30! GET READY FOR THE GLORGY!!!!!!!!!!!!
Attention ladies coming to the party tonight! Tonight will be another chance to win the 5 bucks for getting my cousin hard. Bring your a-game, no one has been able to overcome the whiskey dick yet. Good luck.
They ran out of ice at the party, so I fixed my drink with frozen broccoli....the show must go on!
We found him in the backyard throwing shoes onto the roof yelling "WHO BRINGS CROCS TO A HOUSE PARTY?!"
My doctor actually said I was suffering from an "acute hangover" in doctor's note I asked him for....what a douche
I need to pull it together. I just cried my eyes out to Master Chef Junior.
FUCK IM ABOUT TO GET A DICK PIC IN THE LIBRARY
Get ready tonight we are going to get drunk and pierce my nipples
Maybe if I ever do become a counselor, I would just implement a kind of intensive meme therapy.
Does anyone remember last night? Because I still don't know why I now own a goldfish and a ceiling fan made of pizza?
I'm hungover and in a fort. And I hate you.
So many questions
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