Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
The way you explained my vagina was exactly the way I would of described my breakfast burrito.
On a scale of one to Chris Brown, how angry are you?
i just walked into thanksgiving and three people in a row asked me who i was. really?
You came on your own forehead. Just wanted to remind you that.
my summer class's final was canceled bc it interfered with the world cup. he is giving us all A's on it. I love europe
obviously he wasnt ready for this jelly and you can quote me on that
Theres either a bag of coke in my pocket or a bag of anthrax, either way last night got way to serious
I have no idea, but there's a bus parked in front of my house and like 6 texts saying im gonna prove my love. this is either really really awesome or really really bad.
P.s. I loved that your balls smelled like coconut
Somehow I became in charge of getting my mother laid? This can't be my life? Lol
I feel like I shouldn't be left around 30 year olds when I'm drunk
Where are you? Where am I? Why am I so red?
I may or may not have puked near a bear on the side of the road this morning.
i think you might have coined the term "slightly awkward pyromania"
Randomize
