Is it weird i consider You Sexy Thing our song?
She came over with Guinness cupcakes, a case of Mickeys, wearing an Ireland flag & nothing else.
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
i don't know where i am. i made bad decisions. i think this guy is dead.
All he wants to do is masturbate while I sit there with my big toe up his ass that is not even the worst part of it.
What type of outfit says "I know you slept with my boyfriend before and are also way skinnier than me, but I look better...somehow"
Riding on an electric horse at the grocery store... dunno how that conversation went but I hope you picked up a 12 pack.
I STRONGLY considered not bringing that guy home with me last night simply because I'd JUST changed my sheets that morning.
Still want to know how you got back last night? Two Campus Security Officers carried you in around 430. Your pants were around your ankles.
I hate Sailor Jerry.
My entire summer has consisted of being too drunk for this shit, too sober for this shit, or too hungover for this shit.
He looks like he was the one that always had koolaid stains around his mouth as a kid, he can fuck off.
im half tempted just to scoot up to him and whisper "I'm not wearing underwear" but idk if thats a heartfelt apology
My feelings for him are donzo molonzo but I can't turn down a pierced penis...
HIS DICK IS GLORIOUS AND I WANT TO RIDE IT TO VALHALLA
He said he broke his back in 3 spots & my first thought was "there goes my booty call".
Did u have a 2nd thought
I need a new booty call.
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