On a scale from 0 to 24...wait, 3 to 24, where 6 is the lowest and 12 is the highest, how freaking high re you right now?
I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
Somewhere out there, someone is getting laid. And then theres me, watching Star Trek porn while my roommate plays World of Warcraft next door
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
He's trying to kill me, one liver cell at a time. It's going to be a slow, but awesome death
He was carrying a rolled up carpet saying he was saving it for tomorrow's Walk of Fame.
Sorry I fell asleep again. I'm in the shower now. Door is unlocked. Condoms are in my desk. I want your game face on for when I get out.
I had a dream that we erected a stage in our living room for "impromptu performances" how can we make this a reality?
NEVER LET ME DO THIS AGAIN I FEEL LIKE I'M GONNA SHIT MYSELF TO DEATH ARGHHHHHGHHG IS THIS WHAT DYSENTERY FEELS LIKE
I just encountered the same creepy guy I showed you, he jumped inside the dumpster screaming.
Dude. She came to my room in nothing but a trench coat. Took it off and said, "you like" in her Costa Rican accent. God I love college.
I almost don't wanna have sex with her because I'm afraid she'll steal my hat
I need to sleep so I can die properly tomorrow.
Randomize
