I think I saw a glimmer of recognition, but she must not have been able to make me out through all of her whorishness.
Cruel joke of nature. Hair on head runs from face, and hides on various parts of body. Aging sucks.
Get here now. This is going to be possibly my most dangerous idea ever, and I'm the guy who challenged a hobo to a breakdance fight.
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
I'm questioning the dried chocolate syrup on my tits.
I'm sorry I dragged a dildo (on a leash) into your room last night.
Found a beard hair in my crotch.... care to explain?
At the ER. Dropped bottle lead to cut foot which led to me drunk hitting on doctors. Not going well.
I just sent you a google doc listing all the reasons why I should stop hooking up with him. Feel free to add to it.
Very impressive. My GPA is the same amount of orgasms I can offer tonight (valid only tonight): 3.5
Sorry my hands just texted you
He said i got a new job lets blow this money he bought 4 bottles at the club he is now crying after seeing the reciept
Spotted: shirtless guy wearing cut-off hot shorts, 1 cowboy boot and a sombrero puking in a bush while his friend yelled 'stop being a bitch" from the sidewalk'. Happy 4th of July 'merica!
He went down on me while i ate a whole 7/11 pizza. New level unlocked
I went up to u at the bar, you grabbed my face and said, "hey you're Juan right?"
Randomize
