You're the unicorn of the gay community. Unbelievable and unattainable.
Dude dan is so baked he taped his remote to the futon so he couldn't lose it again. Come over here
He doesn't make grammatical errors. Even while getting head.
She keeps referring to it as an "us" Either she is seriously mistaken on what fuck buddies are or she learned another meaning of the word "us"
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
She's licking the seat belt now. Feeling a little uncomfortable
Can you deep fry cheerios do you know? crucial question
he told me that my best friend was "one the most attractive people he's ever seen" and wondered why he didn't get a blow job
Tonight will be judged a success if I walk out without having thrown up on my shirt.
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
Im just saying it can't be that bad if he drove himself to the er. We'll head that way when we finish playing scattergories
You lured him into the bathroom with a trail of jello shots, then proceeded to barricade the door with duct tape. You really should have thought that one through..
STDs are my biggest fear, besides whales. They're so fucking big.
My mom just told me I look like darth vader. how's your night?
the teacher told me he was disappointed and when I asked why he just shook his head. remember that kid that caught us having sex behind the school? pretty sure that was his son.
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