You're the only person with a favorite bar in Disneyworld
Can you believe The 5th Element didn't get best fight scene in 1997?! I'm still bitter. 12 years later.
Haha how do you remember that?
HOW COULD I FORGET?!
Just sneezed out a half gram of coke into a tissue. Four hours after the fact. The bender continues.
Make sure your heart doesn't explode. These are words of wisdom.
Hypothetically speaking, what is the proper response if one gets bitten by a most likely not rabid squirrel? Hypothetically.
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
You challenged yourself to walk backwards all the way to the bar... And you did
So because I'm off tomorrow that means your dick could be in my mouth majority of that time
So in my DUI class I had to write down 3 people I'd call if I needed to talk and why...they all want to meet you now...
We're too hungover to prance.
I'm starting to think that Cosmic Steve ripped me off
First time a guy goes down on me and his dog had its head on my knee the whole time. I swear it was judging me.
Like every two minutes he would pull out and whipser "don't you do it, you bastard" while looking at his penis. His new name in my phone is 'penis whisperer'
If everyone felt the happiness from apple crown royal we would be in a better place
In hindsight, maybe rearranging his living room because he has OCD while he was out wasnt the greatest idea. Though it'll keep him busy for HOURS
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