there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them
I woke up in a strange girl's bed and rifled through her mail to get her name.
I feel like our bond as friends is a lot stronger now that I've talked to you on the phone while having sex.
i just want his dick, seriously i'm about to take trifiling lessons. we'll call my alter-ego blair and she will screw his brains out, girlfriend or not.
That's what happens when you let Keystone Light make your decisions.
billy ray cyrus is narrating a show on the history channel. my iq cant decide whether to go up or down.
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
I just followed a trail of feathers and glitter to class. Today better be fucking magical.
Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
He deleted all his profile pics with her. It was like the bat signal for single women everywhere.
What made this night legendary was getting pulled over for looking suspicious while wearing an iron man mask
This morning I got out of bed 4 HOURS LATE, made eggs with a plastic beach shovel, and then ate them using pens like chopsticks in my bed with my turtle. Obviously, I am not in the mood to be proactive with my life today...
You know what? The sex was so bad that I don't even care that I gave him strep.
What's the worst that could happen? I'm already broke and my leg's already broken
What is the proper Father's Day protocol when you're sleeping with a guy who has kids?
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