Her gag reflex was as absent as a father figure must have been in her childhood
She made a guy cry in the bar. I will have her, oh yes, I will have her..
Im so ripped right now that i just filled the almost empty bottle of choc syrup with milk and drank it straight out of the bottle. It was on pointttttt.
I still havent given him the valentines day card i got him. I feel like just writting...."sorry for the horrible blow job i gave u last night." and just giving it to him.
should we take a power nap before our cocaine gets here?
HOnestly. That's my one goal for this whole trip. I don't give a shit about souvenirs or sand. I want penis.
We woke up in an inflatable kiddie pool full of both empty and full beer cans. In the middle of his dad's office. Oh, and we were locked in. Nobody remembers.
We had sex after spending two hours in the drunk tank. It was really deep and meaningful
I think you blew it when you asked her "Do you look good naked too, Or is it just the bra?"
When you start quoting save the last dance you need to stop drinking
Thats gotta be it. Also just found out that the fireworks will fit in the airsoft pistols...we are all gonna die
My exam ends at 4pm so I plan to be passed out in the bar by 5pm. Want to join me?
I'm still not 100% sure who I'm sleeping with
right after that u started calling me g-force and started trying to bellyslide down his drive way
Had a dream last night where I asked you how your Christmas was and your response was, “sex, man. Just lots and lots of sex.”
Good god. A spell so dry your friends actually commit it to their subconscious!
Randomize
