Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.
I was just at the bank and there was a fat lady wearing a cape. today is gonna be awesome.
No, dude. Even Jesus hates Creed.
i have two emotions: emotionless and blind with rage
you crashed our wine night double date and sat on the floor eating cheese talking about how big his dick is.
Apparently I got mad at you for "Not drinking with me till we thought we were seahorses" and smashed my face on your door. Then I put my feet in the oven and started crying because I was drinking alcohol from a pot. My life is spinning out of control.
I may or may not have traded your body to the rodeo's owner for free beer.
Currently siting in the living room naked, staring at one of the girls across the street in her living room naked. This is like the most intense starting contest of all time.
Btw he dated my mom. You're Eskimo siblings with my mom. Good job.
This popcorn tastes like salt and regret. It reminds me of the first blowjob I ever gave.
You've ruined popcorn for me.
You meet the best people naked in a hot tub at 2 am.
Steve watched craig and I have sex from the top level of his cat tower this morning.
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
If I get my period the weekend your parents are gone i'm removing my uterus.
Randomize
