i forgot what you looked like. so we left to get pizza. sorry
You were scared that your teeth were shrinking so you stuck your fist in your mouth. then you were convinced your hand was growing cuz it got stuck so yu started crying
the people next to us in line are buying a 12 pack and a snuggie
I just saw two girls throwing up in the bathroom. they were high-fiving under the stall...
Can I sell my birth control in a yard sale?
You never know, some chick could have a weird unibrow fetish.
I blacked out after you got about 8 goldfish out of the tank and put them in your pockets. We're not allowed back. It was a sucky Walmart anyway...
I got pulled into the conversation by "she sleeps with everybody" then "she" involved sleeping with "cocks the size of a viva burrito"
I fell asleep on the air hockey table and someone turned it on, scariest shit ever when you're that fucked up
Jake and I will do a protection ritual for ur dick I don't know where she has been
how do you play pong handcuffed?
You were supposed to behave this weekend.
But... naked.
Sorry bud. Having a shitty day because the GF broke up with my wife and I. We really liked her too
TJ is going to paint me in a Patriots Jersey he can paint you in an eagle jersey. Did this last year and got so much dick.
Literally.... Guy kissing himself in mirror in this hotel elevator
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