I can tuck mytits in my pants
You screamed 'pound me, you big thick stud.' I looked around for porn cameras.
Shut up. I did not.
I really wish I was making that up.
Just caught my bro jerking off to a lane Bryant catalog
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
through my window right now you can see the hot chick next door is standing BUTT ASS NAKED eating peanut butter off a knife.
ill be there in 5.
They asked if I wanted to shotgun a beer and before i could ask who had a knife they all had bit holes into the cans. Im never leaving Germany!
i want you to know that after i type the word "your" , vagina is next on my auto correct text
Dude, didn't you know? Its balls out wednesday.
well, obviously he didn't fuck me for my strong moral fiber.
Did you just reference Ludacris during my possible pregnancy scare of 2012?!
Its completely acceptable to go naked under my graduation gown right?
Some ppl might frown upon it but theyre prudes
Showed up to family party blacked out and in a turkey costume. I'd say thanksgiving was a success.
I still don't know his name but his ass is spectacular. Like he should never wear pants.
Holy. Shit. I just remembered all the lapdances....
Like how do you live your life and have never made a grilled cheese? The audacity of some people
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