my history teacher totally just suggested that we record his lectures and play drinking games with them later so that we pay attention to the material.
They are literally fucking next to the DJ Booth to a techno Remix to Pacman. She is going waka waka waka. WHY ARE YOU NOT HERE FOR THIS?!
Internet sex stories have completely ruined the word sopping for me.
FYI angry masturbation is not as cool angry sex
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
Counseling BFF to break up with her BF. We will get that 3-way
Just a heads up, i'm sleeping in te back seat of your car so don't be freaked out when you see me in the A.M.
Why was there a 1000 piece puzzle covered in hot sauce being cooked in the microwave?
Thats stupid. Your future is a life of less pay for the same work. Free drinks is how capitalism reimburses women for its inequality. & youre not even taking it!
He really thought ahead and just left the tequila in the mail box for late night pickup. Best. Friend. Ever.
The funny thing is, we kinda did bring guys home cause you had a fort...
He said I gave him the best head he's ever had and I bowed. I BOWED.
The amount of effort it's taking me to not shit my pants this morning is probably a sign to slow down the drinking
Went up to some dude that hit on Laura and told him he has a voice like a grandma. Apparently didnt have muscles or kindness like grandma so can you pick me up at the ER please?
Dude, someone puked in my washing machine last night, I tried turning it on to clean it...not a good idea
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