So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
You tried to tell me you weren't high while you were eating French onion dip out of the jar with a spoon
We're official. Living with your boyfriend sounds so much better than fucking your roommate.
They seriously just ended our alcohol presentation by giving us beer cozies. I love college.
TAKE ALL THE MAERHMALLOWS AND PUT THEM ALL IN THE MAGICAL NIGHTSTAND
When I take mushrooms I can feel your presence down there. I can feel where Africa is too.
Id have to say flaming beer pong was a royal success.
If I puke off the kayak tomorrow think nothing of it.
When you see a guy in a wheelchair try to be cool and pop a wheelie, and then fall over backward and hit his head, is it funny or sad?
This is true. I'm still having Jess write "no drugs" on my left hand and "except weed" on my right hand
You are my best friend, but sometimes best friends need to punch each other in the face
I want to go out and have good clean fun.
Ok, but that does not include Bud Light Platinum and your vagina.
I feel like it could help stop wars and begin world peace and the continents can unite for one Monday because chicken fries come back today
I need all the beers. I want to be holding on to the grass so I don't fall off the earth drunk.
Thanks for the reference. If your boss hires me, I'll buy you a drink.
If my boss hires you, I'm going to need it.
Randomize
