I just didn't expect you to be so naked....
He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
I tried to throw up out of my window but I forgot there was a mesh screen.
I knew I was in the wrong bar when "I have a daughter your age" was some random's pick up line.
Sincerely would love to tap that, on a mountain with the wind blowing on your pubes .
Oh damn. God have mercy on everything w a dick in a ten mile radius.
100% truth: never tied someone to a bed using 4 pairs of sweatpants before
Hopefully my orange shoes will distract people's attention from my crippling awkwardness
If there was a tv show called "True Life: My 58 Year Old Dad Rolls Better J's Than Me" I'd be on it.
Jesus Christ that hit just spoke to so many levels of my soul. It's caressing them softly
also new logic of mine : I fuck a Scottish kid , Scotland national animal is a Unicorn airgo I've come close to fucking a unicorns descendent, mother always said dreams come true
We had sex and then I offered him a cookie...while he was still inside of me. Basically he's in love
The highlight of my night will be digging in other people's garbage
It was like if the scent of sour milk and burning tires had a baby in taste form.
I don't wanna see it, I don't wanna touch it, I just want it in me.
Randomize
