yes because when i jack off the first person i think about is christina applegate
I'm a big fan of 2 things right now: 1) Gatorade and 2) the fetal position
I want my own midget army. I think I would be a good midget army leader.
God gave me these boobs for a reason other than for people to throw things down them.
my mom just cut me up lemons and limes so i would have some vitamins with my tequlia
While I was fucking him, he grabbed a taco off his shelf and started eating it. I had taco dripped on me. I have no idea where the taco came from.
Russians do not operate on the same level as the rest of us. hoping I wake up tomorrow
Reunion weekend was a success. Had 3 ex's inside my vag. Hat trick!
You need to stop thinking about the needs of your vagina and concentrate on the greater good
I'd rather blow Nickelback than be told he gave me gonorrhea. I'd even post it on Facebook for all of the world to like, share, and judge me.
I'm making a date with someone on Playstation Home. That's how my sex life is going right now.
I'm sorry you caught us fucking in your bathroom. If it makes you feel any better when I tried to put my pants back on I dropped them in the toilet.
So I sent him a snap of me half naked holding a pie last night.
He is a sweet angel sent from dick heaven!
I'm at that stage of drunk where just imagining having sex makes me motion sick.
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