dude your girlfriend loves you alot..she yelled your name lastnight in bed
I consider it a successful poop when you only have to wipe once.
just woke up to a 10 min voicemail of you singing "99 red ballons".... you need to work on your german..
I mean. If you don't have time I understand, but my dick doesn't.
I don't think I'm emotionally ready for this blow job.
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
the only way to explain how i feel is someone rolled me down a big fucking hill and then a dog came a took a huge ruthless shit in my mouth at the bottom
OH FOR FUCKS SAKE! SOMEONE TOOK ME FOR A GODDAMN PROSTITUTE!! IM WEARING LEG WARMERS!!! THAT IS LIKE THE LEAST HOOKERISH THING TO WEAR!
Whatever. I am not explaining the physics of my dick slapping.
He ripped my sink off my bathroom wall and then threw up in it.
Election Day 2016 shall forever live in infamy as the day when I hobbled through my neighborhood, mascara melting down my face, wearing one slipper and a cast, blood and cum all over my skirt, carrying a box of wine, and no one even noticed.
I don't trust my subconscious. It sleeps with my exboyfriend sometimes.
He's a fucking ninja- think of the things he can probably do with his dick.
So I came to the conclusion that who ever pour my ever clear out saved my life
So how do u get your coat out of the coat room when someone is fucking on it?
Randomize
